How did I get on their naughty list?

Sorry for lack of posts lately.  Between David's physical therapy appointments after knee surgery twice a week, Ben's neck therapy once a week and Josh's speech therapy every other week, things are a bit busy around here.  I might need therapy before we're done.  Today, however, I had to post because I think the birds have it out for me.

It began with the infamous heron poop blackout of E-town.  I am not making it up.  Recently when I was working at the hospital a blue heron pooed on the fly over a transformer box and the resulting short made our part of the city loose power for an hour.  It took a while for the backup generators at the hospital to kick in.  And where was I during this time?  All alone down in the basement of the old hospital, with the former morgue on one side and enough nuclear material on the other side that when it was installed (for a machine that treats tumors) homeland security and the bomb team where involved.  It was pitch black.  All the doors are electronically locked.  No light whatsoever, though perhaps I might have started glowing had I been trapped down there for much longer.  (I kid, I'm sure the higher powers thought of a good way to contain the material in the event of long-term power outage...right?)

The next incident with the foul fowl involved my car as their chosen poo target.  I wasn't parked under a tree and wasn't aware that someone had put a hit out on me, but came out after work to find nasty little splatters literally all over my car.

The final straw was this:

No, it isn't the Blob From Outer Space coming to demolish that poor house.  This is what graces my living room window.  I didn't even think it was possible for a bird to poo here.  There are no ledges for birds to sit on above my apartment.  The only explanation is that a bird pooed on the fly with the wind blowing just right to send its little love package smack into my window.  The worst part is that I have no idea how to clean it.  We're up too high to clean it from the outside and even if I removed the screen, I'd have to totally lean my entire body out the window and then reach up to wipe it off.  David would probably have to hold me to prevent my sudden death.  Maybe it is a good thing I don't have good accidental death insurance coverage, tempted as he might be with all the nagging I've been doing lately about his knee therapy.

I don't know what I've done to tick off the local feathered population, but if you notice someone walking around holding an umbrella when it isn't raining, or startling whenever a pack of pigeons take flight, you'll know its me.